When I Grow Up I Want To Be A Wine Dog Too

Well, next week I turn 5 months old, which doesn’t sound like a lot but in dog years that’s like 3.5 years old. I’ve been hanging out at work with my new mum for a little while now and I’ve got to say my time at the winery has had its ups and downs.

For starters this guy called Mark Nikolich said I looked more like a marsupial than a dog or even like something called a “Gobbledok” – I have no idea what he means but a lot of people laughed when he said it and someone said something about Smiths Chips, I don’t know what they are either. But anyway, I decided I would do a number two under his desk to get even.


All the humans here aren’t so bad. There’s one guy called Luke and he’s REAL nice! He looks after me when mum is busy sometimes and lets me play with his Heelers – Rogue and Jessie. They are really cool! I think when I’m bigger they might even let me share their sticks and tennis balls! Sometimes when I see Luke I get really excited and pee a little bit then everyone makes a big fuss. I don’t really get what the big deal is though.

Actually, everyone in the cellar door is really cool. Courtney has these toys on her feet and jangles them in front of me every day. She calls them shoelaces and gets mad at me when I chew them, I just think – lady stop asking me to play then yelling at me when I do. She does give the BEST lap cuddles though so I guess that makes up for it.

Then there’s my mum’s boss Rob, he seems like a decent guy. One time when I peed on the floor he even cleaned it up and didn’t seem to mind. He lets me chew on cardboard wine boxes in his office and oh man they feel so amazing. He doesn’t like when I go through his bin and chew up papers though. Personally, I don’t see what the difference is. Mum says he pays for my food so I should behave myself around him better but I don’t get it because I’ve seen my mum buy the food before but I’ve never seen him buy it.

I noticed in his office this picture of three dogs in a bucket, and I heard people talk about the dogs were Merlo, Billie and Hermes and that they were “wine dogs” and have their picture in a book that people actually pay money to buy.

I think I would really like to be in that book too. I don’t even know how Merlo got in the book he doesn’t even know anything. He’s always breaking stuff like the pump thing in the fountain, he jumps on what they call “customers” and he’s always running around all crazy. I mean, even Billie, like she’s real nice, BUT she has quite a rich aroma and a fuller figure. Most dog models would have to be athletic I think. She is good at tug of war but she mainly just sleeps all day and snores real loud.

Hermes on the other hand, well they don’t call him the Greek God for no reason. I hope I can be just like him when I grow up. Stoic, good looking, brave. He was the original face here at the winery. We didn’t start off the best because he found me annoying and he bit my ear and made me bleed. But I didn’t mind because now I’m tough like him. I heard once he bit Merlo too when he was a puppy and Merlo cried and cried and still won’t go near him.

So anyway, that’s my story so far. I hope that by sharing it someone out there might see this and help me get my OWN page in the Wine Dogs book next year.

Love, Archie


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